


Knowledge

by YellowLion



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Angst, Oneshot, Spoilers, The Suffering Game, episode 55, he says shit once but yknow, just merle thinking through his choice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-30
Updated: 2017-01-30
Packaged: 2018-09-20 21:06:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9516278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YellowLion/pseuds/YellowLion
Summary: He knew enough.





	

Merle knew enough.

He knew when Mookie's nose scrunched up like that, he was pouting. He knew when midsummer came there would be freckles scattered across his darker skin, taking after his mother that way. He knew that Mookie said he didn't like vegetables, but he loved it when Hecuba's brother would make a stir-fry of every green thing in the house, just because he loved the way his uncle let him taste test and allowed him to watch him toss the pan in the fire. He knew Mookie loved the way Mavis would use all sorts of colored ties to create a strange garden of his curls, spraying everywhere without the girl's whirlwind attention. He knew that he would never stop trying to climb, always dropping from trees and scraping his knees to hell. He never cried—only grinned with his tongue sticking out through the hole where a tooth used to be. He knew Mookie was still awestruck by his sister, but not enough to always go along with what she said.

Merle knew Mavis liked to play anything and everything musical. She pretended now that she was older that she was embarrassed to be asked to show off for the relatives. But she really did love it—she was going to make a fantastic bard. He knew she could be bossy, tugging Mookie into playing with her dolls—he wanted them to get married, she wanted them to fight dragons. He knew Mavis loved the quiet of a winter's day, the carefully kept silence of reading by her mother's side as Hecuba relaxed for once.

He knew enough.

He knew he hadn't been there like he should have. That he had left them to wonder if it had been their fault Daddy had left. He knew that Hecuba was still too angry to look him in the eyes, that she might ask him to come back despite that if he could get his shit together and be a good father.

He knew enough, but he always wanted to know more. He wanted to know what it had been like to hear Mookie and Mavis sing together for the first time. He wanted to know what Mookie’s first words were. He wanted to know what Mavis had looked like when she had begged to keep a cat she had found wandering, what they had done when it had gotten pregnant. He wanted to know the feeling of teaching his daughter how to swing a handaxe, how to defend herself from the darkness in the world. He wanted to know what Mookie had done when he first lost a tooth. He wanted to know when they decided what their favorites colors were and why. He wanted to know how Mavis had sounded at her first concert—how Mookie had looked after his first bite of greens.

He couldn't lose the last memories of his happy family, the beauty and miracle that was so much good being born from such a mistake of a man and a woman he hadn't deserved.

"I'll take the penalty."

 

 


End file.
